All your hopes and dreams are dead
What the oblivion is salmon?
You ok tho?
Fish.
Yes.
My dick doesn’t smell like fish but thank you.
Don’t you mean spear tho.
Really now? I would of thought it was that cesspool in between your legs
No no, I had the cesspool removed and I put in a jacuzzi. Really adds to my street value.
You should really quit cooking salmon in it, then.
What the oblivion is salmon?
You ok tho?
Fish.
Yes.
askayem started following you
[Hi I love you its damon mod]
“There’s an ominous stench in the air….”
It’s your upper lip.
Really now? I would of thought it was that cesspool in between your legs
No no, I had the cesspool removed and I put in a jacuzzi. Really adds to my street value.
You should really quit cooking salmon in it, then.
[Hi I love you its damon mod]
“There’s an ominous stench in the air….”
It’s your upper lip.
Really now? I would of thought it was that cesspool in between your legs
askayem started following you
[Hi I love you its damon mod]
“There’s an ominous stench in the air….”
ask-mehrunesdagon started following you
“Yes? Who are you?”
“Your end, whelp”
Sky’s eyes widened “Excuse me?”
The ground rumbled violently as an ominous presence filled the air “You heard me, cur.”
ask-mehrunesdagon started following you
“Yes? Who are you?”
“Your end, whelp”
Anonymous asked: Never being able to harm any mortal ever again or spending a hundred years in Sheogorath's presence and being unable to do or say anything
“Piss off, mortal.”
[He would choose the second option.]
(Source: warofwales, via elennia)
The knee of the creature hit Dagur straight on in the torso, but he paid no attention to it he would not let go of him and continued his effort to knock him to the ground. He wrapped his arms around him, gripping his sides as though he was trying to tear a stone in half.
Dagon got bored of the two playing slap and tickle, and he made his minion despawn. A small dagger, a replica of his famous dagger, dropped before the nord. “I suppose you have entertained me enough. Now be gone before I change my mind.”
Dagur tripped and fell as the weight of the stranger finally disappeared he tumbled over his head and then over himself.
“Oh come on! I was havin’ fun!” he shouted, annoyed by the creature’s sudden disappearance.
“Get your knickers tickled elsewhere whelp. My shrine is not your plaything. Now, take the dagger or leave, lest I use it to cave your head in.”
Dagur sneered picking up the Dagur and throwing it at the giant statue. He was not very happy with such a gift, ”You’re a dick. Only wussy thieves use daggers. I ain’t go time for wussies. Goodbye, you dick.”
Dagur stumbled away and down the stairs, as he goes off to find someone else to harass while he was still drunk.
As the arrogant man was ascending down the hill, he had pulled up a bigger rock in his path to trip him, just as Dagon muttered “Whelp”
(via withtalosasourwitness)
